How to Interact with Humans and Other Non-technical Skills Developers Need
summary
Argues that empathy is the core skill and offers concrete tools: Enneagram for mapping nine personality drives, active listening and reflective paraphrase to avoid misunderstandings, and a practice of assume positive intent to reduce escalation. Cites fatherhood with five children as formative, cites Darrell Davis’s work converting more than 50 KKK members through conversation as proof that relationship work can change minds, notes the Big Nerd Ranch “thanks” Slack channel as a simple, working culture builder.
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chapters (25)
- 0:00Intro
- 1:19Do unto others as you would like them to do unto to you
- 5:06Code of Conduct
- 5:33Episode 7 is garbage
- 6:10Tribalism
- 7:22Spaces (obviously)
- 9:22Two sides of the brain
- 12:15You cannot reason someone out of something they were not reasoned into
- 13:42Human Connection
- 15:22Social Media
- 15:47What can I do?
- 16:21Empathy
- 17:46Sorry about your leg, bro.
- 21:40Honesty
- 23:22Don't project the past on your present
- 24:40Celebrate the success of others
- 25:21Mudita: Finding joy in the happiness and success of others
- 26:13Respect Outrage
- 29:07Take time to sit down and talk with your adversaries, you will learn something and they will learn something from you.
- 30:59Avoid negative communication patterns
- 31:18People may forget what you said – but they will never forget how you made them feel.
- 32:55Active Listening
- 34:28Own your mistakes
- 35:41Assume positive intent
- 38:08Provide an opportunity for amends
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