How Parenting a Neurodivergent Teen Refactored My Management Style
summary
Parenting an 11-year-old with Autism and ADHD forces concrete fixes that map to engineering management: explicit checklist and whiteboard chart routines for chores, documented Jira templates and a clear definition of done, scheduled emails and batch and buffer messaging to protect deep focus, and using LLM summaries to compress long comment threads. These tools create a custom “management API” that reduces context-switching, turns vague commands into measurable tasks, and makes progress visible — the checklist routine and documentation approach demonstrably improve completion and reduce breakdowns.
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chapters (14)
- 0:00Introduction
- 1:05My technical background
- 2:32Flawed management approach
- 3:56Vague commands fail
- 6:02Cost of poor communication
- 9:10Meltdowns and context switching
- 10:36Batch and buffer strategies
- 12:47Scaffolding and documentation
- 13:50Leading with why
- 16:16Personal connections
- 18:42Tailoring management
- 21:06Custom management API
- 23:11Trust and empathy
- 24:36Q&A
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